Scientists Plotting Our Zombie Demise!

Posted In: general chat forum

      • Participant
        maestro on #1355

        Alright, since NASA’s plans to blow up the moon today have yielded no visible result up to now (it’s still day, silly!) we will keep that in mind for the evening and proceed with another alarming plot of science to end our civilisation: the Zombie Apocalypse.

        While the rest of the populace is busy building batmobiles, scientists punch out one paper after another which somehow deal with the topic of Zombieism. Clearly they know something that we don’t. (Which is, after all, what makes them scientists.)

        It started with the “Mathematical Model of a Zombie Attack” (VTK reported). But even political theorists had their field day in “How international relations theory would cope with a zombie uprising”. reports today “The University of Florida’s e-Learning web site had a number of plans for continuing to provide learning support services in the event of natural disasters. This being Florida it naturally has plans for dealing with hurricanes. It also has a plan for dealing with a disease pandemic and temporary closures of the school. And it has a plan for dealing with legions of the flesh-eating zombies. […] It warns “zombified users will be inarticulate and unable to clearly describe technology problems and use cases,â€￾ but on the bright side, “the spread of ZBSD to institutional administration may simplify and streamline policy making resulting in dramatic improvements in administrative responsiveness.â€￾

        Meanwhile, the University of Chicago even has a “Zombie Readiness Task Force”. Their 25 members were out there to take it up with the undead night after nightputting on ties and politely making their proposal before the sort of school officials who don’t smile a lot. This time, not only were they recognized, they also wrangled student-organization dollars out of the school — $5,500 to be precise — to bring author Max Brooks to campus, the guy behind “The Zombie Survival Guide” and “World War Z.”. Because we all know that money didn’t stem from some defense appropriations bill that weighed body armor for our troops against the future safety of the world..

        To no one’s surprise the story doesn’t end here. The very same university included in their recent “Model United Nations” conference the mock situation of a zombie outbreak!. “It was controversial, sure,” said junior Sam Fishman, an undersecretary general for the Model UN. “It’s a serious conference. Some people got upset. But I thought it was fantastic.” []

        Are we really to believe in a correlation of funny pranks? When they zoom out in the Resident Evil movies, guess just where Raccon City is. Chicago. Coincidence? Fine, you take your coincidence and i take that chainsaw bayonet.

      • Participant
        necromancerza on #8310

        The Chainsaw Bayonet seems a bit sluggish and i think that your longer range capabilities are a bit limited as your barrel tend to drop more. But I think Final Fantasy solved our close combat problems with that Squal revolver sword.

        And Tx -M .. I clicked on the blueblood link with the fullest intention of reading the article .. then the girls appeared under my mouse cursor … 😉

      • Participant
        maestro on #8311

        @necromancerza wrote:

        And Tx -M .. I clicked on the blueblood link with the fullest intention of reading the article .. then the girls appeared under my mouse cursor … 😉

        Deceptive sources are a pillar of quality journalism

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