1012 really bad halloween jokes

Posted In: humor

      • Participant
        maestro on #316

        five bucks says you wont make it to the end of this list of absolutely horrific halloween jokes:

        What is as sharp as a vampires fang?
        His other fang.

        What do you call dead cows that come back to life?
        Zombeef.

        Where does a one-armed man shop?
        At a second hand store.

        What do you call someone who puts poison in a person’s corn flakes?
        A cereal killer…

        Did you hear about the guy that lost his left arm and leg in a car crash?
        He’s all right now.

        What did mama cannibal said to baby cannibal when he told her that he really liked his grandfather?
        “Would you like another piece?”

        What do you get when you divide the circumference of a pumpkin by its radius?
        Pumpkin pi.

        What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley?
        I’m bone to be wild.

        What is the tallest building in Transylvania?
        The Vampire State Building.

        What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
        Frostbite…

        Why do witches use brooms to fly on?
        Because vacuum cleaners are too heavy…

        Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
        Because demons are a ghoul’s best friend.

        How do witches keep their hair in place while flying?
        With scare spray…

        What is a vampire’s favorite sport?
        Casketball…

        What is a vampire’s favorite holiday?
        Fangsgiving…

        Why doesn’t anybody like Dracula?
        He has a bat temper.

        Why did the Vampire subscribe to the Wall Street Journal?
        He heard it had great circulation…

        What’s black, white, orange, and waddles?
        A penguin with a jack-o-lantern.

        What did the vampire say to the English teacher?
        See you next period

        and last but not least:

        What do you call a witch who lives at the beach?
        A sand-witch. 😀

        if you still couldnt get enough, tthere are entire websites dedicated to the topic 😕 :

        http://www.crewsnest.vispa.com/halloweenjokes.htm
        http://members.aol.com/_ht_a/pumpkinave/jokes/
        http://www.corsinet.com/braincandy/jkscary.html
        http://www.theholidayspot.com/halloween/jokes.htm

      • Participant
        maestro on #3284

        of course there are websites dedicated to crap horror jokes… where do you think I get the ones for the newsletter from 😉

      • Participant
        maestro on #3285

        i knew it the moment i saw them 😀

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