Ok you said you wanted me to read this….. and that you wondered what my opion was…..
Rule number one is don’t ask lest you really want to know?
so in this I ) and yes with out permission (( have taken “artisic freedom ” with it to rearange it “ever so slightly” thou I will say it is still your work and will always be so and so I give you this……
The passion OF the Hunger
He glared at her from the window,
He could hear her heart beating fast now,
Sweat drenching her…
Her eyes search the darkness
In vain for the evil she feels but cannot see….
He normally lingers with his prey…
One this striking, he could smell
A musty odor between her thighs
she had known exctacy just moments before.
He would over shadow this memory
This hunger has been eating at him for days,
Leaping from the window,
Such suculent prey,
He feels her bones breaking beneath him like twigs
She Struggles for her last breath
He pauses in this moment
Plunging his fangs deep into her neck,
Her heart pumping…
Pouring the life blood down his throat…
The taste is ezquisite
Forbidden
He closes his eyes listening
Her heart clinched
With in his grasp, it soon fades
Then there is silence.